went to banner briefing at PA headquarter with jane today. and now too lazy to go to studio and start work. haiz. how terrible. i think i had too long a break.

so i guess we're back to normality? so weird.

ok just one more week. try to focus awhile more...

i don't have to read. i'm victim to the evil manipulative thoughts. my brain is so useless. should probably learn that occlumency thing from snape.
haiz. don't laugh. it's not funny.

i've to be more serious with the Krabat-reading and homework-doing.
on a book binge after realising that i can borrow not 4 but 20 books from CentralLibrary. it's revenge time. lol. found some very interesting and probably useful books but not much time to read. 'Street Theatre and Outdoor Performances' by Bim Mason has interesting examples.

fears and insecurities. yea that's about everything.
sounds stupid, true. but sometimes inevitable. sometimes scary as hell. and depressing. illogical and obsessive. like can't stop thinking about it. sometimes just sad. not even worried or annoyed. just downright sad. other times not so bad i can work properly. other times i'm even oddly happy, full of convictions, optimistic.

77777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777

i find that makes a nice border. haha.

maybe we're just really different people. i don't know why that should affect me, but it does.
you are evil. you do all the thousand rules and i just stupidly sit here and nod my head. maybe i suffer from some kind of inferiority complex. lol.

maybe i'm going nuts.

check out my new blog. haha. it's supposed to be for my works and stuffs related to school and hobby. pursuits. but it's not quite up yet. i'll start tonight or tomorrow. when i get tired of work.

it's under 'whatnot' on the list of links on your right.

suddenly feel better after reading old news. like don't think about it. it's good, and it will get better. not like i've never been through it.

just/must do it. work.
to do today: site analyses, think=>confirm final structure, perspective. sleep.
to do tomorrow: plans, sections, elevations, model.

Krabat seems promising. i'm still on page 28. 15 more pages to go or i'll get that annoyed look from my dear teacher.

here's wishing my sunshine a happy holiday and the jiayous to last all the times i'm under an umbrella.
and nguci has to study hard! and i think you are, so that's good.

samuel's paper2 is on monday. so today was the last lesson before os. omg. how. hope all goes well.

feeling downright miserable. and i can't even concentrate on feeling miserable because of design questions. this sucks. went to the site again today. some new inspirations but still locked. and i can't concentrate on design because of miserable thoughts.

today was a freaking lucky day. all the buses i took came within 1 minute of my stepping into the bus stop. amazing. and i went to the site with the clouds looking grey and walked 20 minutes to the middle of nowhere, stayed around for half an hour and walked back. and it rained after i boarded my bus. and continued raining all the way to siglap up to one stop before i alighted. amazing2.

but that doesn't stop me from feeling miserable, tired and uninspired.